The Rage-Clicker
Furiosus checkoutus
Appearance
Distinguished by rapid, repetitive tapping of the beak on a single point. Plumage darkens visibly toward the tail end of the encounter. Often accompanied by an audible exhale, inaudible to the scanner but inferable from typing cadence.
Habitat
Payment forms, "Submit" buttons, modal dialogs that have already been dismissed once. Rarely found in onboarding flows, almost always near the moment of intended conversion.
Field notes
The Rage-Clicker arrives at a payment form with clear intent. It attempts to proceed. Nothing happens. It attempts to proceed again. Nothing happens. The seventh attempt is indistinguishable from the first to a casual observer, but Replay Vision has been keeping count.
Resolution
Typically, abandonment. Occasionally, success, when the button finally responds and the user proceeds, visibly suspicious that something else will break. A small percentage convert anyway.
Hazards observed
Disabled submit button with no error state. JavaScript error in the form-validation library. Stripe webhook hanging. Sometimes a 2-second response time you have stopped noticing.
If you spot one
Rage clicks usually mean the button gave no response, not that the backend broke. The click registers, but nothing spins, nothing disables, and no error appears, so the user tries again. Throttle your network and hit Submit on your own checkout. If a second passes with nothing on screen, you have found what the Rage-Clicker found. A Scorer scanner rates every session 0 to 10 for frustration, so filter it to checkout, alert on the average, and send it to whoever owns the flow.